--Being a Mother...being a child...

I grew up in a big family where I have got six siblings. My mother calls us as her seven angels, because we are all girls. My Dad's genes are scarce with creating men to propagate the clan as they say. Regardless, we never felt at any instance my father ever being disappointed with us. We are all born at least 3 years to five years apart so that makes it planned I guess. On my seventh sibling, my father's last try of luck, he stopped wishing to have a son. I know that he is destined to have girls like us to take care of them as they grow old and not one of those he passed on his hammer and saw. As I grow, I was taught on how to be more independent, learn how to value little things, and what mold me probably now to become persevering by studying hard. My parents send us to good school regardless if we have meager staples.
We were never a problem to my parents. The seven of us completed college degrees and not to ever involved in vices, smoking, drinking,premarital sex, truancy...name it. Having a relationship within the education period is a big no-no to father. I recall my father driving away guys who frequents outside our house. He knew that they were merely staying there to have a sight of us. Although, my father was a certified martinet, we grew up sociable, religious to a certain degree and learn to keep self-esteem. As soon as we graduated from high school class, we were sent to the Manila where it literally means they won’t be able to barricade us 24hours a day, seven days a week. I felt it was a relief since I’m embarking challenges outside of paternal guidance. There were hesitations from the way they would talk to us, pieces of advice we are to forever keep to maintain the dream they want for use. I remember the night I left my home was one of the saddest moments of my life. Even if it meant that I am to thrust my step a little forward to a new chapter of my life, where independence will be my very own delight, I knew that deep inside me I will miss their presence. I'm leaving the cocoon I have woven since birth. I'd be missing my dad most of all and the frequency of us talking again will be lesser and lesser. This was the time I also confessed and admitted to myself in soliloquy that I'm a certified dad's girl. I was the only one amongst my siblings who sleeps with him and is interested of the manly chores he does.

After a while, I was able to cope up with homesickness. At first I would sob secretly on my morning matins or evening vespers, until it came off gradually. College was fun. This was completely different from high school. I have learned so many things from being frugal and spendthrift, to being lavish...to be stalked and admired at least several times and in the end turned each of them down...and married. All through out, I realized that whatever my parents taught us, or probably how I was influenced with poverty and education, being the ticket to a good life, I, us, the seven of us, never faltered in clinging to that old advises. I may not have been spoon-fed when I was little, or probably cuddled so many times by my mom, nor had birthday gift ever from her, or may have been hugged or kissed when I do a good job, or whatever mother's sweetness, I can attest to the fact that my mom, my dad loves us more than anything else in the world. We have overturned upheavals while we are away from them as we grow, but it didn’t change our values in life. Now, that I am being a mother of two plus two, I am not sure if I can implant that same upbringing as my kids grow. I’m not clingy with them or at least I try really..Yet it's too soon to say I am a good mother. It's a profession no one could ever perfect. And so I realized that my mom was good enough to raise me like this although I am not an easy child sometimes when I was with them.

I give all of my hearts out to my mom. Who’s one of the greatest there is.