Why people fail?

5.0 ? Does it ring bell?

Mathematics isn't my cup of tea. I was looking up to become like Cristina Pecson someday yet I ended up as a Chemical Engineering graduate. College was more of life to me than highschool. It is were I have grown fundamentally as a person. This is where I become myself, out of the four walls of our home.

During our baccalaureate mass, I felt totally relieved and contented to some extent because it is the beginning of an end. Finally, I would stop thinking how on earth I would surpass each class involving numbers. Chemistry,
although involving nu
Im not saying I am proud, I'm happy that I failed. Mathematics isn't my cup of

Keep your faith.

If there was one topic my husband and I would bicker back then, it was religion.An argument that lead into something, -- marriage. He didn't believe that there is someone omnipotent guiding us.For him, all can be backed up by Science. I disagreed but it was a healthy fight.


Everyone needs religion. I'm not in a position to prove or stand as a benchmark of the catholic denomination. I just know that I have faith in Him.I spoke to a colleague just recently, and said she didn't have a religion, or at least for most families in her country, after my query. In a snap, it was an eye opener for me. I was surprised to know that in that country religion comes the least,pardon my naivety. She admitted it without hesitation. Then my next question was , WHY? How about Buddhism, or Hinduism or any ism's of any created religious group out there? And then I ask another, and said the same. She started asking what we do as catholics. I started recollecting those things I have learned back then, since religion is a pass-on habit. Her curiousity led to many questions, and I feel like I was selling my faith to her. She seemed convince enough to ask when and were she can listen to a mass with me. Then I said, due my current schedule, I have been able to attend the mass very frequently on Sundays. And she agreed on our mutual time.


I could imagine my self living without believing into something ---at least into anything. Religion will give you a sense of belongingness and self esteem. A path, a guidance, a direction, and intangible faith that something good will happen.

I am a Filipino and I am proud.

Part of my daily routine is checking social media sites,and I think for most of us, Facebook and Instagram has become every ones mutual friend. Being away from home, this allows me to easily get updated instantly. Just recently, my good friend shared a link of a recording of a call from a Filipina wanting to be transferred to an American based center, the company being outsourced. I was hesitant to listen to it, but she said that the woman was despicable. And I reckon.

I raised my family through working GY shifts for 9 years and it is a decent job. In fact, grueling. For me, the most difficult part besides the fact that you work on shifting schedules, the pressure arising at work with scorecards and fastidious callers, is the risk of traveling at wee hours. Not all people could afford a cab at night therefore relying on public transportation and God's divine guidance from lurkers of the night. After listening to that belligerent Filipina's call, despising
fellow countrymen in ill, I cannot imagine how someone can be eternally ashamed of where they come from.

Filipinos have surfaced far enough worldwide in almost all sort of industry, and we have proven to be a rich nation, ironically coming from a third world country. My gut feeling pushed me to incorporate the word "rich" to describe my country because we are. We belong to the most hospitable and friendly nation. Our country have adequate resources to sustain it's people, but always the question lies to the people running it. And, yeah I don't to be a full pledge political economic adviser to say that, yet I know that only if we are governed by good leaders, I'm sure, I wouldn't also entertain working abroad.

Regardless of the negative stigma that our government brings to people, or even if I think we can be looked at as the most corrupt nation, or a nation of domestic helpers to them, I am will always be proud of my grass roots.



I am Filipino and I am proud.

taken June, 2012.

"Real happiness are shared."

I have grown to be independent. My parents taught me how to be. Yet, for once I would admit I am not.


Every time that I realize I am working out here, alone,miles away from my family, I instantly snap my path to the homesick lane and start analyzing if you made the wisest decision in your life to leave them. I can't believe it just happened too fast that my only choice was this. And, yeah this is only a temporary feeling when you are sad. Me and my husband are used to being with each other and this is one thing I need to overcome everyday. We are both so excited to his trip here and a celebration of his "tieth" birthday. While I was busy listing out those things that I wanted him to bring, I was also tied up with planning the itinerary for his four-day trip. I want to make sure we make most of the time while he is here.


Time is unbelievable. Just this morning, I would see him "Kellogs is typing" on my chat screen, now we are already sharing one breakfast together and feeling the same heat of the sunrise. I am happy that I have someone to talk with on the train, while walking on the side road of the HDB blocks, at the hawker center or even at the grocery store. He would now fill in those space for me to remember. Everything now seemed completed in a sense that I feel contented. Compared to my previous house, our current flat have more space and better ventillation. We have a spacious living room and our most favorite spot is the window at the living room over looking the Kallang River and the glittering lights at night time plus the cool breeze. For bloggers like us, this is a haven.

Inasmuch as we would want to be nonchalant of the time and stop it, our days together were spent well. I toured him around the city,the places I go and of course the food....

Of Marriage.Of Family

I came home rather excited tonight unlike the rest of the days. My husband will come for a visit and is arriving at midnight tomorrow so I would stop counting days anymore. I cant complain much about today's work since it was not an entirely busy day. We had a chance for chit chats and side conversations which make work much lighter and less stressful. We got to smile.I found an interesting book sitting by the shelf in our living and started reading it at the train on my way home. I am not a bookworm,but my recollection tells me that at one time I was a Sweet Valley High fanatic, read two novels of John Grisham, and read the all time --Gone with the wind. I have attempted to get interested a couple of times ,those written by Coelho or that Japanese author, and some others because they were all famous and widely read, but I'd stop after a few chapters, I lost the enthusiasm.Yet today, -I suddenly went way past Chapter three and that is ---something!

The house were all lit up as I opened the door.Those yellowish lights were always adding drama to the room and the fancy chandeliers hanging by the dining room makes the house more of a home than that being rented plain flat for quarters. My room mates were done with dinner though the plates were still at the table. They are in the middle of a serious conversation. I joined them a few minutes after as my stomach was inviting me for supper. We are having fish today. Yes, I screamed silently. I have been craving for fish very lately and it was served just in time to fulfill it. I sensed I already have an idea of what topic was, and I am right.

I wouldn't probably elaborate the very details tonight's tete a tete but this boils down to family matters. Marriage in itself is a family.It is a sacred thing that needs perpetual faith towards one direction. When betrayals come along the way, which becomes a trend ironically,either one amongst each partner always thrive to withstand it though some are really irreparable. Like most men, have this kind of disease to yield to temptations very easily,---and now I'm sure they will disagree. You are welcome disprove my theory though.

When you get married and bear children, your entire self changes.The definition of life is structured within the future of your kids and that instinct to see tomorrow in their eyes. Each time they call you "mama" gives an automatic job and responsibility of their well being. When they smile, they talk, or say I love you sheepishly suddenly becomes your point of interest. Their achievement in school, or when people praise or correct them in a way, is a manifestation of how you groomed them as parents. You turn to be their leaning walls as they grow.

Family is important. It is responsible in the formation of our own behavior. It instills innate characteristics different from others, of our self esteem, of how we aspire things, of the presence of love and support from your parents strengthens that personality,and the lack of it. Yet, this is ideal. I am not entirely proving that what we are now, is what our family was,
but trust me, most people become what they are now because we are a living shadow of the intangible things carried out from our parents.

I didn't grow in a perfect family. When I say perfect,I portray them as 'family that prays together, stay together' thingy.
However, we have a common vision about how to live our life to the most. My parents taught this through example as we grow. Our hesitation about many things are because we were not give enough encouragement at home. Our strength to accomplish our dreams are because we get that push and appreciation from those influential in our life.

Quite frankly, this was the first time we ever got to talk personal and I like it. This gives us, as friends and room mates , that bond to care for each other while we live in one roof. You get to appreciate their sincere effort to comfort you. I may have dealt my own trials alone which made me stronger to my own belief, and my friend here, may go another kind as compared to mine, but still at the end of the day we aim to make sure that our family is protected no matter what. And there will also come a time that everything that is now, is just part of that past, and you smile.

It's almost reaching midnight and time flew without us knowing it.Everyone went to repose as it is another day ahead in a few hours.
And yes I went to bed feeling excited for tomorrow.

Days out.

My relentless coughing is giving me some stress. At work, I'd cough in between calls and or sometimes while you are talking your throat would itch horribly. I have been waiting for today. Since we moved, I have always been eager to go home. There's so much space to linger, the cool breeze by the window, and a good spot overlooking the city. A perfect place for my blogging. Unlike the usual rest days I spent at Tiong Bahru, I've got company today. Janey and Joff are both at home, and we've panned out a few itineraries last night. Since our place is seated near Kallang River, we have decided to explore the neighborhood. We have found a temple just beside our block, and there is a long side road where people could jog anytime. There is a small awesome bridge brightly lit in the evening.

God's timely reason.

Im not the religious type I must admit. Regardless of my my absence to my social duties, I still believe about the many unexplained things by Science.

Today, my faith is tested.

My little Sam has been acting up too much already and I cant handle it anymore. Her tantrums are annoying and she can't be of help mostly.I have to bring her to a shrink. I thought my sister would accompany me, but since her back is excruciatingly painful, she will stay. So while I was prepping up, almost ready to vamoose, I saw her putting on her pants and she said she's going to see her doctor too. I thought it was her usual pain, yet she told me to hurry up all of a sudden, her face wan and silently screaming in pain. Haphazardly I grabbed my things, and as I was about to step out the room,the mirror fell off on the floor in front me along with my scream. The wind blew too heavily that it seeped to the small opening of the window pushing the mirror outwardly.I heard from someone that whenever a mirror breaks it means bad luck.---of which I think isn't true, although I would admit I got also scared.My sister became nonchalant of the shattered glasses strewn all over the floor. She told me to leave it for later as she couldn't handle the pain anymore, and I felt the sense of urgency. Hailed a cab and rushed to the clinic and unfortunately what loomed before us was an enormous queue almost filling up the whole seating capacity of the clinic, around 50 heads.A few minutes after, she ran to the rest room and vomited at the sink and felt a relief.Although her lower back was still screaming in pain. Honestly, I was afraid. Being her older sister, and seeing her like that, I have to show her source of strength. I told her to withstand it and even mention to her how many more painful stuffs I have gone through in the past that I was able to overcome. Besides the fear that it isn't anything serious, I was also thinking back how I would be able to settle this financially, knowing that our HMO has limited coverage and most laboratory tests and consultations are expensive and are to be reimbursed.My mind was praying earnestly she would be OK. For her,our trip to Mount Elizabeth ER was the longest ever, as she was calling out in pain. She was given heavy painkillers as it is deemed to be kidney stones. The staffs were dominantly Filipinos which gave us some sort of confidence that somehow, she will be taken cared of.

She dozed off with alleviating pain from the injections.Her friends, our room mate was so obliging that they helped us financially knowing that we've recently moved and practically tapped out.This gave a relief instantly. Thank God we are surrounded with really good friends.I cant think of any one else to call to. She was still a bit groggy due to the morphine injected, but we got to get going for the next step. She said the pain is manageable. Lunch passed too quickly. As we were passing some boutiques in Orchard, she was already also looking at things, window shopping in other terms, like the way we usually do when we are together at the mall. That was an indication that she's back. We quickly went to the Samsung service center and had my phone fixed, after 45 minutes, Sam is 100% in commission. The technician replaced the bloated battery and gave her a complete reflash or she said update. I'm extremely delighted. The day ended with her eating the famous Wally's ice cream in Orchard, she said, she haven't tried it before. Tomorrow, we shall return to the clinic for Xray and CTScan which is hopefully available at Fullerton. Today the good this is that she's ok and there's already the light beaming at the end of the tunnel.

.

I realized, God puts meaning to all of the things happening to us.As I was cleaning the broken mirror when we got home,I thought that isn't really a bad luck as opposed to what other people say. After all, I am lucky that the time stalled was because that nick of time saved me.I could've been hit by the glass or it shattered all over my toes. It isn't also coincidental that my sister and I had similar off today for nothing. I was there for her succor, so that I could take her at the hospital when she was in dire pain. I came here in SG to work with her because we were going to look after each other no matter what. His divine reason for things is timely. He knows rightfully when it will happen.

I trust that all will be for both favors because I trust Him.

~h

My first sojourn.

This was unannounced. I have warned my colleagues not to post anything regarding my vacation. This is a surprise. Part of my MO was to connive with my friend Fil to pretend meeting him at the airport for Xeon's school bag. During our daily conversations, I would lie on going somewhere or doing something else while I was busy packing up and buying presents. He never noticed.


That night, I barely slept a wink. I am so excited. This is obviously my first time to travel alone, and I am kinda nervous I'd feel nauseous on plane.

#Throwback Thursday what?

 
Just recently, I frequent Instagram and followed a few people. Mostly checking on fashion trends and what not. Then this Throwback Thursday thingy got into me. It becomes a usual feed now. My friend Google helped me answer this questions as always. First: --What's the big deal about throwback Thursday, aka #tbt? Second: Why Thursday? If you are an Instagram or Twitter user, am sure this already flashed to your mind probably along with Flasback Friday.
 

 
Throwback Thursday was coined sometime between 2010-2011 not long after hashtags became a feature in Instagam.It's simply posting your most antiquated, nostalgic, and usually funky picture that is strikingly different than you do now. I find it to be an excuse to dig in our dusty pictures sitting in our photo albums that hasn't been touched for the longest time, until phone cameras became too handy. And the more odder it looks , the more it fits the #tbt criteria. I have seen many post that doesn't go with the #tbt rules.According to denizens, if you want to post a picture take some week back, let's include those times we forgot to post a favorite picture can be tagged as #latergram. You see,in doing #tbt, time is of an essence. I know anything than happened a second ago is already contributing to a past,but throwback requires something you probably like to remember or otherwise.
 
Throwback like a pro:

Now tell me if this picture doesn't come by the rules: #tbt #selfie #90's

~h

Doctor, doctor I am sick.

For quite sometime,I have been feeling this lower back pain and it has come to be bothersome now. It's excruciatingly painful especially when you are stationary. Working in a call center entails mostly sedentary jobs as we sit between 9 to 10 hours in front of the computer chewing up calls depending on days where I had to extend overtime. I woke up this morning hardly able to stand and I had to curl up in my cot so I'd feel a bit of a comfort. Not most clinics are affiliated with my HMO card and I had to rely on the memory of the time I accompanied my sister long time ago at a clinic. I was starting to picture out how to get there. Luckily, I found the clinic without getting lost.
 
The doctor's clinic is a bit small. I noticed that patients only take not more than five minutes of face time with the doctor. When it was my turn, as soon as my face loomed at the sight of the doctor when I opened the door, he immediately asked me "What's wrong?" in his accent.I was surprised. He didn't even allow me to hit the chair first before even asking me what is wrong with me. So, I sat without an invite, and told him I was suffering from lower back aches generating towards my abdomen and my shoulders. He had me turn back at him, was told to raise my arms and slightly touched the muscles in my nape and shoulders. He started writing on his RX paper and I added a few things I was still feeling. I explained that the pain was going all the way to my abdomen, and my shoulders. So then he told me to lie down and quickly pressed my abdomen area asking me where the pain was.It took me not more than five minutes of consultation without even telling why I was feeling that way, what was that pain called, or why, or at least things doctor's usually say when you are unwell. I completed my doctor's trip feeling disappointed that I felt I was not diagnosed well. There were packs of medicine given wrapped in a small ziploc along with the instructions written on a sticker taped on each of them.
 

 
I can't help but compare the kind of service Filipino doctors give back home whenever I had to.Back home was lot better. They have this pleasantries that will magically make you feel better and relieved that he is going to give you the right medicine., And trust that they know what they are doing.Since, I had to skip work today and seek medical attention, I have to get the medical certificate he issued, otherwise I could have confidently tell him that the MC is not essential.More than anything, I need to be healed.
 

~h

My "first time" chronicles.

Working is nothing easy. Just like anything else that we do, it serves a purpose.My decision to work abroad is a big challenge I know, but for sure it is for greater reason. I need to overcome homesickness daily with many alternative diversion I have yet to discover. Blogging has ceased in my itinerary since then, and I realize this will be a great way to alleviate loneliness. Since Singapore is a diverse city, there's a lot of things that can be discovered. Unlike Manila, Singapore relies mainly on government facilities. HBD's are one of those even foreigners dominantly live on shared flats. My sister and her friends got a flat close to the city, and I'm joining them. Everything that I will do will be charged to my "first time" chronicles. We live in a flat with two rooms, a decent living room, kitchen and bathroom. I didn't expect much of a home decor, as usual most tenants just rent purposely to sleep, cook bath and rest here. Other than the usual sofa,some flat screen LCD TV, dining table, 12 cu ft fridge, a bed and kitchen utensils, it's all there is. A lot of Pinterest home decor tips were already flashing in my mind, what to post in the walls, and corners as I sat.. My room mates were just so accommodating and extremely nice, which made me feel like I am not far from home. Most of the time I find myself alone. My sister is doing graveyard shifts, and my other roomies.
 
The main thing I learned is, -- know my way home. During my first day, second and third, I still get lost somehow.Either the train is going to other side of my way, or I exit the wrong way. The MRT map they gave me was really useful,I pull it out when my sense of direction is going awry.My way to work, is a two-MRT ride, green and red line, then a quick bus trip, which will take roughly 45 minutes of travel time. Ironically, I find my trip unusually comfortable. Back home, I would silently complain that distance.Here, since locals depend on public transportation, everything seem to work well. The coach are wider and well ventilated but a little bit "spiced up" of which I am getting used to as time passes. There were announcement of train estimated time of arrivals flashing on the TV screens per station. People follow the arrows painted on the floor to tell passengers to wait for alighting commuters to get out first before they get in. As days turned to a week, I have already learned a few local gestures.
 

 
Since my sister works on GY shifts, I hardly see her awake that long. I asked her to teach me how the washing machine operates since it's automatic. My first attempt to use it was not quite a failure, but a little bit challenging. It took me a couple of hours to wash . I feel like the clothes were still dirty knowing that I didn't manually washed it.But then, it has to come to another try before I can get used to it.
 

 
In Manila, it is uncommon to get warm water within your reach when you bathe. Oftentimes, I'd heat a kettle of water in the morning when its colder season., or unless you have a heater installed. Yet, this is only available to those who are a little bit well off. So here, since it's a common amenities in every households, I tend to always forget to turn the heater switch on before I get in the bathroom. The umpteen times I have also forgotten to turn switches while charging.
 

 
I know that there are still many things here that will go to my first list. And I hope it aint gonna be an expensive "charge to experience" --first. :)
 


~h

La Singapura.

My first weekend.

As soon as I settled my self here,I messaged Fil right away.He is a very good friend in college and is my eldest daughter godfather. We have fondest memories together.The fact that I live with my sister and I have a friend like him here, I didn't feel the separation anxiety, at least for now. He invited me for a barbeque party along with his colleagues. He fetched me at the MRT station near the condominium he live. This time around, where he lives, were all surrounded with landed property far from tall HDB buildings. Overlooking his flat, were big trees, bungalow houses, and dainty Chinese scenery.

~h

Hurray to 2013