It's hard to explain sometimes when family and personal happiness are thrown at you juxtapose, a feeling brought about by people finding a better opportunities abroad. I could imagine the loneliness. My father in law just left today for KSA, his home for more that 20 years already. The month long presence of knowing there's a "man-on-the-house" gave me a temporary peace of mind. My husband is not a fan of menial domestic jobs. carpentry, wirings and stuffs. Im ok with it, doesnt make him less though. We're not all born jack-of all trades.Now that he's back there again for another two years, got me a tinge of sadness. When he's here, I feel like someone can make tough and better decisions at home, than we can. A man who can look at the safety of the house, his grandkids mostly since, my husband is an only child. His mom would have a husband, in presence not in thoughts of which has been their lifestyle since they decided to stop their business here and work abroad. Can I handle that? I dont think so,especially with kids around. My idea of family is a little different., but of course,we got various preference.
When I was ten, I could imagine how it is during Christmas eves when my father was working abroad.I would cry in the middle of the night, because I miss him, and I'm not vocal about it. I would either enclose a letter when mom snail mails saying how much I have missed him, or write myself a journal. I know that my dad and my father-in-law shares the same reason as to why they have to be away to work, instead of staying. Some lucks are better off out there. Probably, his mom has gotten used to it. The grandkids doesnt mind his leaving though. I'm not sure if they ever feel the sadness, but for me, being away and the loneliness is unbearable. The motives are perennially constant and selfless. I admire the courage his dad bears when he has to choose something else. Now,we're back in the same household he's left. After sixteen hours, he's back in his quarters in a different country that has served his home instead of us.
In the coming days, I wish for something else besides a house without him.
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