---Nature and it's cycle

Im so tired and emotionally drained but I have to hang on each day smoothly.Sometimes I think that I just inflict the pain to myself so I can get over with it sooner than I thought but I realized you cannot teach nature lest it will become more difficult to handle. Things just go away giving them natural death. At this point I’m quite confuse {not to the point of leaving}..It’s a feeling of how to deal with things while you are weak and down. A certain knack you have to draw somewhere from "someone" to vaccilate in between nostalgia and survival! And oftentimes only a few people really takes effort to take a peek and understand the situation before even judging you..and the saddest part is if the people you are pertaining to are those you expect to be a part of your so-called "wallowing".

However, deep inside you, there’s that instinct to be at your best and high hopes that things will be fine in time anyway. When you’re severely wounded, all you feel is bitterness and definitely excruciating pain, questioning all living creature you see..and asks WHY? You ask where you went wrong and what could have been done to parry mishaps., yet I find myself answering my own self. There are things in this world that happen no matter what you do..You cannot control people…even your love ones…{which hurts more than ever!} And during the confrontation, they try to justify what they have to make it seem right though you both know it doesn’t. Nothing can ever justify mistakes because these are actions you do basing it only on your own willingness and happiness sans considering others feeling.. Selfishness in one word.

Afterall, the bottom line is forgiveness! {aint it monotonous?!} I have no choice. The people we’re talking about are those I cannot live without and you wish you have a never-ending urge to forgive. Forgiving is saying it’s ok even if you have been hurt… and forgetting is still far in the offing.. geessh….So I will have to let nature squeeze it out from my system in a given space and time..LIfe is a circle…The least you can do is be drifted and drifted till you get the hang of it! Ironic!